How to negotiate effectively: Tools and tactics
Negotiation is a complex and dynamic process that requires a combination of skills and strategies.
Here are some key tools and tactics that can help you achieve your goals and build trust with your counterparts.
- Asking questions:
Questions are powerful tools that can shape the direction and outcome of a negotiation. They can help you uncover new information, stimulate thinking, provide feedback, and move toward a resolution. Questions should be open-ended, relevant, and respectful. They should also be sequenced strategically to create a logical flow and avoid confusion. - Listening actively:
Listening is the foundation of any successful negotiation. It shows that you care about the other party’s interests, needs, and emotions. It also helps you understand their perspective, identify common ground, and avoid misunderstandings. To listen actively, you need to pay attention to both verbal and nonverbal cues, reflect back what you hear, and summarize key points. - Communicating persuasively:
Communication is the core of any negotiation. It involves using words, tone, and body language to convey your message and influence the other party’s behavior. Communication can be either active or passive, depending on your strategy and goals. You can use communication to convince (by providing logical arguments) or persuade (by creating an emotional connection). The aim is to create a sense of alignment and agreement. - Reading body language:
Body language is a form of nonverbal communication that reveals the emotions, attitudes, and intentions of the other party. It can also signal confidence, interest, or discomfort. By reading body language, you can gain insights into the other party’s state of mind, adjust your approach accordingly, and enhance rapport. - Handling objections:
Objections are inevitable in any negotiation. They indicate that the other party has doubts or concerns about your proposal or position. They can also be a sign of interest or engagement.
To handle objections effectively, you need to identify their type (principle-based, false, or evasive), acknowledge them respectfully, and address them with relevant evidence. - Using general negotiation techniques:
There are some general techniques that can enhance the effectiveness of your communication and argumentation in a negotiation. These include:
- Reformulating:
This involves paraphrasing or summarizing what the other party has said in your own words. It shows that you have listened and understood their point of view. It also helps to clarify any ambiguity or confusion. - Using reverse evidence:
This involves using the other party’s own words or arguments against them. It shows that you have done your homework and can challenge their assumptions or logic. It also helps to expose any flaws or inconsistencies in their position. - Referencing testimonials:
This involves citing examples or cases from credible sources that support your proposal or position. It shows that you have done your research and can provide proof of your claims. It also helps to build credibility and trust. - Taking back the initiative:
This involves asking questions or making statements that regain control of the conversation and steer it toward your desired direction. It shows that you are confident and assertive.
It also helps to maintain momentum and focus. - Using conceptual frameworks:
This involves using theories, models, diagrams, or charts to explain or illustrate your proposal or position. It shows that you have a clear and logical structure for your argumentation. It also helps to simplify complex ideas and make them more accessible. - Appealing to emotions:
This involves using stories, anecdotes, metaphors, or images to create an emotional connection with the other party. It shows that you care about their feelings and values.
It also helps to motivate them and inspire action.
- Reformulating:
By using these tools and tactics, you can negotiate effectively in any situation and achieve win-win outcomes for both parties.
How to Choose the right negotiation tactic
Negotiation tactics are the actions and behaviors that negotiators use to influence the outcome of a negotiation. They can be classified into seven main categories, depending on their objectives and characteristics.
Each category has its advantages and disadvantages, and requires a different level of skill and preparation.
Here are the seven types of negotiation tactics and when to use them:
- The Threat:
This tactic involves pressuring, warning, emphasizing the risks, expressing outrage, harassing, increasing demands, or making accusations. It is used to intimidate or coerce the other party into accepting one’s terms or giving up something valuable. The threat can be effective when one has a strong bargaining position or a credible alternative, but it can also backfire if the other party resists, retaliates, or walks away.
The threat can also damage the relationship and trust between the parties. - The Destabilization:
This tactic involves putting the other party in a situation of inferiority or justification, increasing demands, changing attitudes and behaviors frequently, giving contradictory information, or asking for explanations constantly. It is used to confuse or overwhelm the other party and make them doubt their own position or strategy. The destabilization can be effective when one has more information or expertise than the other party, but it can also backfire if the other party sees through the manipulation or becomes frustrated. The destabilization can also create a hostile and unproductive atmosphere. - The Confrontation:
This tactic involves taking a determined position, showing optimism, exploiting the weaknesses of the other party, attacking their cohesion or consistency, or arguing about one’s strengths. It is used to challenge or persuade the other party to change their mind or concede something important. The confrontation can be effective when one has a strong case or a clear advantage over the other party, but it can also backfire if the other party becomes defensive or stubborn. The confrontation can also escalate the conflict and reduce the chances of finding a mutually beneficial solution. - The Forcing:
This tactic involves playing on time to force the decision, giving a deadline, an ultimatum, or using urgency. It is used to pressure the other party to act quickly or accept one’s offer before it is too late. The forcing can be effective when one has a tight schedule or a limited window of opportunity, but it can also backfire if the other party feels rushed or trapped. The forcing can also reduce the quality of the decision and the satisfaction of the parties. - The Cooperation:
This tactic involves seeking a common ground, building trust, making concessions, or opening new areas of action. It is used to create value or find a win-win solution that satisfies both parties’ interests. The cooperation can be effective when both parties have compatible or complementary goals or needs, but it can also backfire if one party takes advantage of the other’s goodwill or generosity. The cooperation can also require more time and effort than other tactics. - The Attrition:
This tactic involves prolonging negotiations, keeping responses vague, adding new conditions, postponing steps, or temporizing. It is used to wear down the other party’s patience or resources and make them more willing to compromise or settle. The attrition can be effective when one has more stamina or endurance than the other party, but it can also backfire if the other party loses interest or motivation. The attrition can also increase the costs and risks of negotiation. - The Feint/Diversion:
This tactic involves making movements or proposals in a different direction to divert attention from the real goal or object of negotiation. It is used to mislead or distract the other party and gain an advantage or avoid a disadvantage. The feint/diversion can be effective when one has more creativity or flexibility than the other party, but it can also backfire if the other party detects the deception or ignores the diversion. The feint/diversion can also undermine trust and credibility.
Example of general tactical instruments
✂️ Distributive negotiation : A buyer and a seller haggle over the price of a car.
🤝 Integrative or collaborative negotiation : A manager and an employee negotiate a flexible work arrangement that allows the employee to work from home two days a week.
🥊 Competitive negotiation : A lawyer uses threats and deception to pressure the other party to accept a settlement offer.
⚖️ Compromising negotiation : A couple decides to split their household chores evenly instead of arguing over who should do more.
🔨 Power-based negotiation : A boss gives an employee an ultimatum to accept a pay cut or face termination.
As you can see, there is no single best tactic for every negotiation situation.
You need to assess your own goals and preferences, as well as those of your counterpart and the context of negotiation. You also need to adapt your tactics as the negotiation progresses and new information emerges.
By choosing and using your tactics wisely, you can increase your chances of reaching a successful outcome that meets your needs and preserves your relationship with your counterpart.
“Win-win is a belief in the Third Alternative. It’s not your way or my way; it’s a better way, a higher way.”
Stephen R. Covey

